The Girl Who Wasn’t

As I scrubbed at the crusty remains of yesterday morning’s “oatmeal” lining my only pan, I considered my life with a “Well I never thought I’d be here.”

“I wonder how many times I’ve spoken those words before,” I said out loud to the Lord.

Many, I’m sure is the answer. I never thought I’d be in Bible College, I never thought I’d be at Bible College in California for a year, never thought I’d be going to Cambodia for four months, never thought I’d be moving back to Cambodia full-time. Countless other things.

I have this rubbish habit of constantly thinking too much about the future. All the way through Bible College, I longed to get out and get on with “real life”, go do something exciting. Then even though the “exciting” never seemed to come, I switched to just desperately wanting to settle down and have some consistency.
This is what was reeling through my head this afternoon:

Honestly, things have been nothing like what I expected here. I thought I was coming back here to settle for a while. I thought I would come back, have this great relationships with the kids, spend every day reading the Bible with them, playing games, teaching them new things…that was on my heart. In the time I was gone, they started at a new school, meaning they’re gone almost the whole day. And to be even more honest, I feel like half of them don’t even like me anymore. I’m not special to them like their Mom, Katherine, and I’m not fun, like Steven. I’m just rubbish old me, spending more time telling them off than spending good time with them- and doing a bad job of that too.

Two months ago, the Lord started giving me an interest in Uganda. It was fairly strong on my heart for a short time, and the He confirmed that He will have me there at some point, but decided not to tell me when. Then the fire of the interest died away, and now I just occasionally think about it and look up more information and things.

So here I am not knowing the future…will He suddenly move me out of this country I love? Here I am dying to be someone better, longing to be an actual help and blessing to children, longing to at least know I’m staying somewhere for a long period of time, if not forever.
But I’m not.

I am me. The girl who loves children so much, but is useless at thinking of interesting things to do with them, terrible at just talking with them and being friends with them, no good at disciplining in a loving, gentle way, rubbish at showing them what a Christian should be like…the girl who doesn’t know what her future holds, or even what she’d really like to do specifically.
The girl who wants to be content in whatever state, full or hungry, abounding or in need (Phil.4:11,12) but instead is longing for a place to call home and a consistent ministry to enjoy.

The thing is, I dwell in a tent of flesh and blood, and this world is not my own.
I know, today, that I will never feel truly at home anywhere on this planet, because its not home. If I keep on looking for that solidarity, then I will spend my life in vain hope and never be any good for anyone else.
But hopefully, prayerfully, I will one day be able to speak like Paul, being a selfless servant of Christ, pouring out His love, and being content no matter where I am.
And this contentment he spoke of is, I think, not merely being content in situations but being content in self; seeing one’s own flaws along with one’s strong points, and firmly trusting in God’s promise to complete the work He has begun.

I’m sorry for the lack of good updates, I’m rubbish at that too.
But here I am…in my tent.

Resurrection

 

I LIVVVVVEEEE!!!!!!!

Yes people, I’m back from the dead.

My dog ate my homework charger so I’ve had no laptop and therefore barely any internet access for the last month or so.
Things are fairly normal here except the more I learn the native language, the more I lose my English which is making typing this extremely strenuous. (Don’t think I’ve ever used the backspace button this much)

What does my week look like?
Well, four days per week I help two missionary kids with their homeschool English.
On Monday afternoons I “teach” photography to the COH kids as part of their extra-curricular activities.
I spend every evening at COH with the munchkins.
And I may or may not be starting night shifts at a night shelter called Saving Moses- a safe place where “night-workers” can leave their little ones.

Not the busiest of schedules, but God is slowly opening up doors and leading closer to what I really want to be doing here.

Honestly, its been hard.
My heart is totally for children, but I’m 4 years away from being old enough to foster, adopt or be legally considered orphanage staff in this country. I also see the Lord narrowing it down to babies and younger children, but I really have no idea what His long-term plan is, as I really don’t have a heart for one specific area to work in other that being a mother (which obviously isn’t coming for a while yet).
I’m waiting and waiting and know this time is preparation, but its not the easiet thing in the world.

Please pray that I will be content with where I’m at each day, not looking to the future but focusing on what is happening right now; how I can better serve Him now.

Please get in touch if you want. I may take a while to reply but I try to get back to as many people as I can. (Not that tons of people get in touch, I’m just rubbish at getting online and getting on with it)

Hope you’re all doing well!

-Millie

Scarlett

One of the biggest challenges I’ve been facing recently is my age.

I’ve been living in Cambodia for five months now, and recently had my 21st birthday. My days now consist of rising early, walking the dog, teaching English to missionary children from 9-11am and a Korean student from 12-2pm, Khmer language lesson 4-5pm, then hanging out with the kids.
While I really cannot complain about my life, I was never cut out to be an English teacher.

My heart is to be a Mother, whether to many or to few. I want to foster short-term, foster long-term, adopt, help at orphanages, have a house full of little ones from all over the world. 
Yesterday Katherine heard of a one year old girl in the Province who was starving to death. Her poor parents work out in the fields growing fruit and vegetables and she is left alone all day and desperately needs a permanent family to nurse her back to health and love her for the rest of her life.
My heart broke, because here I am, spending my days doing things I feel are not my purpose, with my arms empty and open, and plenty of love to give.
And I can do nothing. 

In Cambodia you must be at least 25 years old to foster, adopt and be orphanage staff. 

At first I got so angry with the way this world is, with its “stupid” laws and age restrictions being the only things holding me back from helping these tiny souls, but God’s Word tells us to submit to authority, and not grudgingly. 1Pet.2:13-17, 1Pet.5:5 
So my struggle now is to have an attitude of submission to my God, and to choose to believe that this time of waiting to be able to fulfill my purpose is not a time wasted but a time of preparation. I see Him working in my heart and changing parts of my life gradually, but can always do with reminding who is doing it (HIM not me!) so I don’t go at it in my own strength.

I decided to pray that the Lord will one day give me a malnourished little girl (for there are many of them) to pour each moment of my day into, and bring to health. This morning I read Ruth 4 and 5, of Boaz redeeming Ruth from what would probably have ended in poverty, starvation and death. How beautiful it is that God gave her that gift, not just food to eat but genuine love and care. 
Hoping that God will choose to use me in the same way as He used Boaz. (Of course for a baby, not for a spouse!)

-Em

The Real Me

My name is Emily Ann Carson.
I am 20 years old.
My birthday is April 5th.
I live in Phnom Penh, Cambodia.
I am selfish, over-emotional, unfaithful, not diligent, easily distracted, slow to listen, quick to judge, short-tempered, lazy, image-obsessed, negative, inconsiderate, ungrateful, irrational, impatient, at times rude, more focused on pleasing people than pleasing my God.
My greatest desire is to be a mother to both biological and adopted kids; to raise children up in the ways of the Lord. I’m very affectionate; I love hugs, tenderness, singing softly to babies as they fall asleep. I can’t wait to rock my children to sleep in my arms and kiss their heads. I can’t wait to teach them, built forts out of pillows and blankets, go outside and show them the beauty of the little things like flower petals and bird feathers, clouds and the feel of grass between toes.
I really like the medical field and would love to good at medical stuff but really am not so think it would be sort of cool marrying a medical missionary or something like that.
I like pirates, but only the ones that aren’t real, since the real ones are horrible.
I love books. I wish I was a good writer but am only a good writer in my head. I like the sky a lot, I love music, photography, dance, art, singing, climbing, soccer, skating, surfing, hockey, snowboarding, most kinds of sports and active things…but I’m not good at any of those things so I just enjoy watching them, listening to them, hearing them.
I love a lot of nerdy things, like writing with calligraphy pens and dipping ink, old books, journals, Batman, mugs, fantasy fiction…but I also love things like classic motorbikes, cars, tattoos, Future of Forestry, nose rings, making dang good coffee etc.
I am country at heart.
I’ve always been in love with cowboys, riding horses, mountains, forests, open country, cowboy boots, rodeos, country dancing, working outdoors. Thankfully God keeps giving me people who come from that.
I like many kinds of movies. Sometimes I can’t stand foofy girly movies, but other times I soak them up.
I have a weakness phobia. I always wanted to be the cool kid but was always the trying-too-hard-and-failing kid. I still do it. I don’t allow myself to be vulnerable because it means I am weak, despite that my God tells me His strength is made perfect in my weakness. Because of this I have always worn a mask and let people think they were seeing the real me when in actual fact there was a whole deeper level.
I love my friends. I care deeply about their feelings, their situations, their lives. I want to be a help to them, a blessing, an encouragement and a light, but I’m often too shy to show any of those things so am usually just the goofy one. I’m bad at having words for people especially when they’re in need of comfort but wish that I was better. I often don’t pray with people because selfishly I’m too afraid to sound stupid and often don’t have the words to pray a good prayer for them, forgetting that its not about what they hear but about what God sees my heart asking for.
I have tons of knowledge after being around Bible College for so darn long, but very little of it is actually applied to my life.
I usually make decisions (often bad ones) based on feelings, because I convince myself that I’ve prayed and God has said yes, even if I haven’t prayed about it at all.
I love to travel. I’ve been to 20 countries now, some more than once. The sad part is that very few of them were visited or lived in for a good reason like missions. The good part is that traveling so much helped to prepare me for missions and the future things God has for me.
Right now I have a heart for Cambodia and God has given me a family here that I don’t ever want to leave, but has also been asking me if I am willing to give it all up again should He lead me elsewhere.

Not once since about 10 years old have I been my true self to anyone, not my family, not my friends, not to strangers, not to the Lord.
As a part of the Body of Christ, God put it on my heart today to be completely honest with you, so that you know who I am. I need your prayer, I need your encouragement, I need your love, but you cannot help me with those things unless you really know me. It might not seem like a big deal to you but…I hope you understand.

Family

I’m learning that no matter how much we desire this place to be a home, a family, children will come and go for one reason or another.

In less than three years, Katherine has gone through what most women go through over at least 18 years. She has become a mother, she has nurtured her children and watched them grow up, and seen them leave home and move on.

It is painful to say goodbye, but though it hurts we must always remember that the sovereign right hand of the Almighty One rests upon these little hearts. We must remind ourselves that Jeremiah 29:11 applies to them as well as us; that our God has a perfect plan for them, and one day we will see the good that came from the pain and from the decisions that seemed to not make sense at the time.

Please pray:

• For Katherine and the staff of COH- strength from the Lord, wisdom, patience, continued love (2 Cor.12:15)
• For the children here, that they will daily see our active love for them in all seasons, whether they are being good or disobedient. That Christ and His love will be plain to them and draw them in to a relationship of their own, with Him.
• For those that leave us- that they will end up in places where they are surrounded by the Lord and His truths, that they will be safe and learn to trust in Him to be their everything. And that they will know they are loved.

 

Layer Cake

They say no man is an island

One day this week I found myself horribly lonely. I just didn’t want to be by myself, but after a short morning of being with people, they all steadily drifted away to do their own things and there I was completely alone.

It strikes me how alone we really would be without our God.

If I take God out of the equation, almost every single one of my friends is thousands of miles away, unreachable. They are not available to talk all the time and I can’t really be in their presence. My family is on a different continent and I only really talk to one of them anything like regularly.
Often I have things that I just want to talk to someone about, and here, sometimes (without God) I have no one.

Even when I do have those people, I feel we in general have three layers: One that we share with the public and acquaintances, one we share on a deeper level with close friends, and one secret inward part that is just between us and our Maker. Without Him, who would help us bear the intense burdens of our inner selves? Who would listen to the deepest cries of our hearts that sometimes seem so ridiculous to even ourselves that we are too ashamed to possibly voice them?

I don’t know if I’m really writing what I mean, but all I’m trying to say is that I’m incredibly thankful that I am never alone. That Christ dwells in my heart, amongst the scars, amongst the thorns, amongst the jewels, amongst the open wounds. And despite all that we have yet to learn, He wont give up on us.

Lessons.

And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake.
For when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Cor.12:9,10

Revelations

Last night I talked with my Mum on Skype. We talked about what I was doing here and my thoughts about the future here. I told her how I didn’t think I would leave after the two years I’ve committed to. I told her about helping in the preschool, about spending time with the kids and a little of Katherine’s plans for the orphanage.

Then she asked me a question:

“Is this what you want to be doing?”

And I realized I couldn’t answer it.

Not because I don’t like what I’m doing here, not because I don’t love these children (my goodness I do), not because I don’t feel at home here. Just because I’ve never actually thought about what I do want to be doing here, or anywhere.
My heart is with children. I want to minister to children that don’t have love, that need someone to hold them, to listen to them, to help them understand things, to read them bedtime stories, to teach them about Jesus, to listen to what they have to say.
That’s all I know.

Today I didn’t have some divine revelation of exactly what I’m going to be doing for the rest of my life, but I did come to see more of what it means to live for today. Regardless of what I hope for or desire to do, my life is not my own and it is up to me to wake up daily to serve him.
“A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs His steps” (p.16:9)

Pray for me, that my face will be set as a flint toward the Lord, that I will wake up and obey His commands, daily asking what I can do for His kingdom.

Thanks.

Moosen in the Woodsen

This is a moose.

The moose is my favorite animal.
I never took the time to figure out why, but I believe some of the reasons go like this:

 

• Moosen live in mountainy, forest, snowy areas (best areas in the world)
• The are quirky, strange-looking animals
• They’re very very tall (like me)

 

This is my Moose.

Since moosen are big, live in cold places and look very weird, and I live in a hot, small place (though it looks a bit weird)…I couldn’t have a moose of my own, so I got a puppy instead. And he’s bomb.

Feb so far:
So those of you who receive my newsletters by email or at church may have noticed you haven’t heard from me since December. Well that’s because I decided to write a bi-monthly newsletter until I get a bit better at recording events. Its not that there’s nothing to write about, but rather so much happens that I forget what I want to tell you about!

Therefore, I’ll be writing monthly (or more) on this blog.
January was a strange month. I seemed to always be busy but never doing anything. I was praying and waiting for the Lord to bring me something to do with my mornings, and in the afternoons just spent time with the children each day.
This month things have picked up.

-As you know, Rachel runs the Children of Hope school (for the COH kids). Her preschool teacher recently quit all of a sudden and I was asked to help out. The preschool assistant took over as Teacher so now I have taken over as assistant three days a week from 8-11am. Its a blessing as I wanted to have more time with the children.

-Last week I got a puppy (an early 21st birthday present from my parents!)
Real dogs are hard to find here-Khmer dogs are little ugly mutts that mostly roam the streets-but a lovely Canadian woman who runs Place of Rescue (awesome place) breeds Golden Retrievers on the outskirts of Phnom Penh. Katherine bought one of the puppies, Samson, at the end of last year and he is wonderful. I’ve always wanted a dog and decided now is the best time. Its much cheaper to keep them over here and after much thinking and praying I went to see the new litter. I fell in love with one little boy (7 weeks old) and took him home. He’s been a blessing, despite the difficult potty training (tips PLEASE) and chewing everything.

I suppose just those two major things have happened so far, but it has really given me so much more to do. My mornings are full and by national naptime (12-2pm) I’m ready to get back to my puppy and my Bible.

Please just pray that I will be more diligent in training my doggy and keeping my house clean as he tends to trash the place with his muddy paws and bowel movements!

Thanks for sticking it out with me!

Much much love!!

January ’12

Definitely time for an update!

January has been a crazy month so far! Lots of teams and people coming, the orphanage moving to a bigger house, me moving into my own apartment, minorly crashing my moto (please don’t be reading this mum!).

So as I mentioned, COH moved across the street into a bigger, much brighter house. Katherine had a peace about that place the moment she entered it and it has been a blessing. The children have a home, not just a house. We recently decorated the big living room with pictures of all the children and staff. Beauty!

I also moved house.
Katherine previously lived in the separate top of the old orphanage, a one bedroom apartment. When she moved out, I moved in. Pictures to follow. Its been a joy having my own little place, having people round for coffee in the cooler mornings, decorating in the afternoons (mostly with whiteboard marker on the tile walls!)

Nick, a friend from Bible College has been here! Its been cool sharing my experience here with someone from back home. He clicked with the boys at the boys house instantly and has been a blessing to them, in fact I’ve barely seen him except when he wizzes by on a moto!

Things are moving on slowly here. I’m still trying to find my place deeper in ministry as the kids are at school most of the day and so my mornings are very empty. Please pray that the Lord will show me what He wants me to do with my time each day, whether its in a specific ministry or just sitting at His feet.

Prayer Requests:

• Please pray for the children, that their faith will grow to be their own, not just them agreeing with the knowledge we pour into them- that their hearts would be solidly rooted in Christ.
• Pray for Katherine, for wisdom as she mothers there 30 children and has many difficult decisions to make.
• Strange request, but pray for whether or not I should get a dog. It would be very nice to have company here and a little extra added security too as I live on my own. Just want to make a wise decision.

Thank you always for all your love and support. I’m regularly uplifted with words of encouragement and the knowledge that people are praying for me.

-Millie

Holiday in Cambodia

Merry (late) Christmas!!
Here is my first newsletter from Cambodia!

Enjoy!

Update 12-11

Sorry!!

My sincerest apologies for lack of update. This time is extremely busy and will be until the end of January.

Things are going very well here and we’re very excited for Christmas.
Today the children did an amazing Christmas show which included the story of Jesus’ birth, songs in Chinese and Khmer and an awesome hip-hop dance! Our kids are SO talented!

I want to say thank you so much for all of you who support me with your prayers and also financially. You’re all wonderful and I thank the Lord for you.

I’m excited to write a longer update for you all about what is going on here.

May the Lord give each of you the most wonderful Christmas and may we not forget the significance of this time of year.

Much love!

New Home

Hello all!

I’ve been here in Phnom Penh for a few days so its time for an update!
The flights went well. My 12 hour flight from London to Malaysia was full of blessings. The food was actually really good, then the two people on my row of seats moved to be with their family so I had a whole row to myself! SO nice on a long flight!

Getting to Cambodia was crazy. I forgot how small everyone is. I’m a giantess here, haha. It has been such a joy seeing all the children again and I love spending time with them every day, playing and being silly. Also wonderful seeing the other missionaries out here again, enjoying their fellowship. The past two days have been filled with bike rides, play-fighting, good chats and home-made caramel macchiato (score!).
The weather is beautiful here today. Clear skies, cool breeze, warm sun

Right now I’m just trying to settle in, get into whatever the Lord has for me and also work out my living situation. I planned to get an apartment on my own but that may or may not change.

Prayer Requests:

• Please pray for the Lord to clearly show me where He wants me to live
• Pray for a safe trip to Siem Reap next week with Katherine, Sara and Channa (WOL lawyer)–Katherine is going there to get stuff done toward her adoption of her son Joshua, pray everything will go smoothly.
• Pray for the children that they will have hearts of obedience and understand the ways of the Lord.

I hope you are all well and I will be writing another update shortly.

God bless!

-Millie

broken glass

I feel freedom.

I asked the Lord to rid me of pride.
And oh how He broke me.
But shimmering bright are these shards of glass
Now that they far better reflect His glory.

“But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light” 1Peter1:9

Calvary Love

“The Search-light of the Spirit discovers us to ourselves, and such a discovery leaves us appalled. How can even He who is the God of all patience have patience with us? Like Job we abhor ourselves and repent in dust and ashes.
But the light is not turned upon us to rob us of our hope. There is a lifting up. If only we desire to be purged from self with its entangling nets, its subtleties, its disguises (false-hoods truly) its facile showing of brass for gold, as the Tamil says; if hating unlove from the ground of the heart, we cry to be delivered, then our God will be to us a God of deliverances.”
-Amy Carmichael

Praise Jesus!

Thankful for two things today:

1.First blessing of financial support! £30 per month, way to support the body of Christ!

2. My Erin and Leah, both blessing my socks off this week and encouraging my heart so much!

Update Nov.8

Hi all, thought it was time for a short update.
I’m not very good at keeping track of things so if this is repetitive, I apologize.

As you all know, this past summer I spent four months in Cambodia.
Well, I’m going back.
I’ll be flying out to Phnom Penh on December 5th.
Before leaving in August I signed a two-year contract with Water of Life, so unless the Lord moves me along sooner, that’s the minimum time I’ll be there.

The Lord really put the children at COH on my heart, along with a few others. As far as I know, I’ll be helping at COH orphanage and at the new Christian elementary school that Rachel opened for the COH kids and some from a couple of other small orphanages.
Its been on my heart to help at the clinic also, but we’ll see where the Lord leads with that as its quite hard to do much if you can’t speak good Khmer.

November has been a hard month so far. The Enemy doesn’t want me in Cambodia, as he’s been discouraging me a lot. Thankfully the Lord has blessed me with a few wonderful friends who always remind me how far the Lord has brought me, and where my heart is really at.

Prayer Requests:

• Right now I have no financial support and have no idea how the Lord is going to provide, please pray I will trust in Him to be faithful
• Please pray for my rubbish organizational skills and that I will make the right choices concerning moving out.
• As always, pray for salvation in Cambodia
• And really, please please pray that my eyes will not be able to settle on myself, only on the Cross and on the Lord’s face. I’m an expert at selfishness and not much else.

Thank you SO much for your prayers and your encouragement.

Much love,

Millie

 

Burning

Reading an article on the conviction of a Russian arms dealer on Yahoo!, I notice the page is littered with ads and other headlines: “Trainer packs on pounds, ‘from fit to fat’”, “Rare kiwi bird undergoes surgery”, “Foods that fight wrinkles”.

I’ll be honest, it makes me angry. It makes me sick.
It makes me think of our cares in this world.
An estimated 700’000-4 million women and children are trafficked globally.
Victims of trafficking are subject to gross human rights violations including, rape, torture, forced abortions, starvation, and threats of torturing or murdering family members.
A genocide is going on in Sudan as we speak, thousands displaced and injured, cut off from aid, mass starvation is inevitable.
In the USA more than 5 children die every day as a result of child abuse.

What do we do? We go to McDonalds, we stare at TV screens, we get frustrated if we can’t get on the internet to check our Facebook, we laugh, eat, drink, sleep, work, complain, pity ourselves. While they are raped, slaughtered, starved.
Why do we not spend every moment of our days learning about Him, spending time with Him, taking the initiative with the understanding of His character and going out to turn the world upside-down? Why aren’t we actively seeking out things to do every single moment? God will close the doors He does not will us to go through when we work for Him, others He will let us walk through, even if that door simply leads to our prayer closet.

I hear you say “well God calls us to different thing at different times, I’m waiting for Him to show me my calling”.
That’s not good enough!
The BIBLE says THIS:

“GO into ALL the world and preach the Gospel to EVERY creature…And these signs will follow those who believe: In MY name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues; they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly it will by no means hurt them; they will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover.” Mark 16:15-18

Listen to me when I say, we Christians have LOST our zeal!
Yes, we love the Lord, we want to serve Him, we let Him use us through our days, but we do NOT throw ourselves into this life He gave us, we don’t grip at the plow and never look back, we hold onto our possessions, our image, our lifestyle, our relationships. We obsess over our weight, our diet, our skin, our hair, our wardrobe. I CANNOT sing “I surrender all”, because I do not forsake every part of this world for the sake of His glory. I do not sacrifice every ounce of my strength and energy, every breath of my body, to His cause. I do not use every blessing He has bestowed upon me to bring glory to His Holy name.

Who will be Paul? Who will be James? Who will RUN the race and be crucified for Him, who will lay down their lives simply as a testimony of His love just for the soul of one person? Who will bring upon themselves imprisonment and sing praises in their chains?

Will you?

Pray for me. Pray that I will.
Because despite this momentary burning in my lungs, tomorrow I will wake and the first person I think of… will be myself.

Doubts

This morning shocked me. Its already November.
Unless God pulls a Macedonia on me, I’ll be going back to Cambodia in a month.

I have to be honest, all of a sudden I’m having doubts.
I remember leaving Cambodia and being so happy knowing I’d be back, but I can’t remember why. I see pictures of all the kids and I love them so much and want desperately to see them again, but I’m so inadequate.
I know the Lord uses the weak, but I can barely keep up my own relationship with Him, let alone be a good example to others. Would God really allow me to be in that position?

I have to ask myself, is this an ungodly fear or is it a lack of peace because God has a different plan?

But a song just came on downstairs, “Though I feel alone, I am never alone. You are with me, You are with me.”

Regardless of my calling in life, my position on the missions field, my desires and hopes, the only thing that matters is that the Lord is with me. The Lord and all that He is, all that He provides and all of His character. All of His love.

I’m pretty sure the Enemy is just trying to discourage me from this big, new, God-lead part of my life that’s about to begin, but I pray He will provide soon, and better my heart soon.

“You whom I have taken from the ends of the earth, And called from its farthest regions, and said to you, ‘You are My servant, I have chosen you and have not cast you away: Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” -Isa 41:9-10

Baby needs Prayer!

Little Baby Loat needs prayer (see below)

If this little girl had an English name it would have to be Daisy. Each time I’ve seen her she bubbly and bright, with the most precious smile.
Loat doesn’t have an English name but she does have Tuberculosis and Meningitis.

Please, please pray for her little body, her little life.
The hospital she’s at can give her medication but that doesn’t necessarily mean she will survive.
Her mother and older brother and sister (both under the age of 4) desperately need a sponsor as they have very few clothes, no place of their own to live and no father to provide for the family, as he left for another woman.
If you are able to sponsor this family, or know someone who is willing, please get in touch via email. If not, please keep them in prayer and I will try to keep you updated on baby Loat and her family.

God bless you,

Thanks